The Secret to Success… in a couple of hours.

Do you hate working for “The Man”? Do you wish you could work for yourself and be your own boss? Why not pay me lots of money to learn how to do just that? I’m assuming you haven’t got huge resources at your fingertips to research my past and check my credentials are OK, and when you notice that I drive a recent model BMW you’ll instinctively understand I’m self-made.

There are a couple of thoughts that might occur to you, but you should disregard them.

Under no circumstances wonder if I own the car or if it’s on a lease hire contract, “for a low fixed monthly fee”. Definitely don’t ask yourself if the ticket prices I charge for the successful self employment seminars are actually what’s keeping me afloat right now.

Absolutely don’t concern yourself with why a successful businessman and hard nosed negotiator would want to teach total strangers how to replicate his success.

No, just trust me.

And ignore the unfortunate likelihood I’m going to spend two hours of your time (for which you are actually paying me) to teach you a three step process: Find or make something people want badly enough to pay for it. Sell it to them. Rinse and repeat. There, that’s all. But I have a PowerPoint and a script, so we’ll cover both points in some detail by the end of the session and you’ll leave still unable to fully articulate your own goals while still feeling good because I’ve spent the closing quarter of an hour dropping relentlessly positive messages into the patter.

Because at the end of the day, your cheque cleared. You’re in the big time now. Well done. All you need is a bit of seed money to get yourself going, hire the car, buy the suit and send out the e-mails.

In case any of the regulars are wondering why I’ve suddenly gone a bit ranty, I’m sick of ditching e-mail invites to pointless conferences on success in business. If my computer hasn’t worked out by now they’re junk, it never will. Go away, purveyors of snake oil made from hundred percent genuine fairy dust.


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