Parlons-nous Franglais? Aves-vous une fétiche?

October 31, 2013

Shopping for medium grade explosives last night in Morrisons, I spotted these little beauties on the counter. Read the rest of this entry »

Setting an Example (Parking)

October 26, 2013

Gah! You go out for the afternoon, take the children round the shops and come home to THIS.

2013-10-26 17.04.28

Read the rest of this entry »


Taking it to the Excrème

September 24, 2013

Yesterday evening, browsing the Tesco near to my house, I found a chocolate bar on the shelf which made me laugh like I’ve rarely laughed before. Read the rest of this entry »

Experiment in random exposure…

February 14, 2012

… not a photography thing, nor something illegal in any town within Her Britannic Majesty’s Commonwealth. Read the rest of this entry »

The most outrageous advertising.

June 19, 2009

I’ve been reading up about a rising Christian worship music writer and his background. It’s very wholesome and humble, and above all, the article talks all about his motivations and hopes for the future.

My wife is not particularly at home with my constant music stuff. She admits it’s her fault she married a musician, but frankly the music sometimes gets in the way of real life.

I argue (generally without success) that music is a central part of my life.

She argues that food, water, roof, light and heat are all more useful to the family than music. At this point I usually give up.

Why doesn’t my article on up-and-coming-worship man tell me about all this? Could it be that a Christian publication is deliberately misleading me? Or does this man have the most fabulous and understanding wife in the world?

Most likely, he doesn’t advertise the internal wranglings and arguments that surround home life. Very few people do. Even I haven’t given you an accurate picture of an argument with my wife. It’s a characterisation designed to make a point. I’ve lied to you. A bit.

Rats. This is hard to do right. Total honesty is a really difficult standard to meet. In this light, I have decided not to accept the article at face value but to assume he’s human and so is his wife, and the article is merely presenting a positive and supportive overview of his personal life in order to gently advertise his professional life.

That’s OK really. I like being positive and supportive.

So that’s why on a recent e-mail looking for a gig, I wrote:

If you want a professional reference, several people I’m not related to will swear blind I’m the new Rick Wakeman, but not quite as rugged.

And if that’s not advertising, I don’t know what is.

No, really, I don’t know.